We have all seen psychotherapy portrayed in movies and TV. Very rarely is it an accurate representation of the process. In fact, the media’s portrayal of therapy is often filled with boundary crossings and legal/ethical violations. Examples: 50/50, Frasier, Dr. Phil, Mad Men. The list goes on and on. No wonder so many people are skeptical about seeking mental health care.

So, what the heck is therapy and how is it useful to you? Fair questions.

At the core, I like to think of therapy as a blend of science, human connection, and empathy that can be used to improve interpersonal relationships, heal from past trauma, manage depression/anxiety, etc. No two individuals’ therapy will ever be the same, even when the same provider and treatment are used. Thus, it can be hard to completely capture the essence of therapy in a few short sentences. But of course, I will try my best:

What therapy is not:

• a place to vent for an hour

• a place where you will tell your someone all of your problems and they will give you an easy solution, give advice, or have all the answers

• a guarantee that you will learn to be happy all the time

• a place where you will be agreed with unconditionally

• a place to feel comfortable and safe at all times*

• a place to find friendship or a non-therapy relationship

Several* things therapy can be:

• a place to explore your patterns and learn how they impact the way you think and feel about yourself and/or how they impact your relationships with others

• a place to develop a deep understanding and take ownership of your values, opinions, and personality in order to create your own solutions and a meaningful life

• a place to build your tolerance of the pain of tough times and increase your resiliency when things do not go your way

• a place to be challenged without the fear of ruining a relationship

• Generally, therapy should be a safe and comfortable place. However, it is also a place to practice taking emotional risks before taking risks in personal relationships

• A place to learn and practice evidence-based psychological skills to improve overall functioning and well-being

Neither of these lists are comprehensive, but hopefully they give you an idea of what is possible when you invest in personal therapy. I want to emphasize that all of the items in the second list require you to take an ACTIVE role in therapy. Not much in your life will change otherwise.

Thanks for reading this Tackett Tip! Feel free to drop me a line if you have any topic requests or questions.